We’re talking about friends, and the fact that a growing number of men don’t have the friendships they need to be happy and healthy.
When I say friends, what do I mean? I have a lot of friends around the country who I enjoy, but I don’t see most of them often. But there are two couples we connect with regularly by text, and by Zoom from time to time. They are all friends, but only those two couples really count in terms of benefiting me. I also have local friends I connect with one or more times a week.
But it takes more than just connecting. Do we talk about surface stuff, or do we share our lives? Do I know their struggles and fears, and do they know mine? Can they tell when I’m down because they know something is off? If I’m doing something I should not, or am not doing something I should be doing, will they know that? And will they lovingly confront me?
One thing to understand it that friendships take work. If we believe friendships should happen naturally, we won’t have many, if any, real friends. Friendships also cost us. The cost is worth it, but there is a cost.
Those who study this say personality is a factor in how we make and exercise friendships. Extroverts generally have many friendships, with some or most of them being shallow. This is not wrong, but you need one or two of those friends to be close. Introverts focus on a few very close friends. And while this is also not wrong, having too few friends is risky, and can be a burden on them.
Speaking of burden, if your wife is your only friend, you’re asking of her something that God didn’t intend and that she can’t do. I’m all about our wife being our best friend, but we require more than that. And we need some male friends.
If these two posts have shown you that you are friendship impoverished, please do something about that. Do it for yourself, and for those around you.
A post worth reading:
Dr. Corey Carlisle | Union not fusion ◄ An important distinction!
Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly vis stockdreams.ai
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The post Cultivating Meaningful Friendships: A Pathway to Happiness and Health first appeared on The Generous Husband.
