Marriage and Sex as Self-Care: Refuge and Intimacy

Let’s talk about your marriage and sex life as self-care.

If your marriage and sex life are a source of stress, this may not make sense to you. But when your marriage is healthy, it can be a great source of calm. It can be a place of refuge where you can rest and recover. And sex can be far more than physical release and pleasure; it can provide comfort, deep intimacy, and strengthen you emotionally. 

A couple on the couch hugging and surrouned by a protective bubble.

I’m convinced this is how God intended marriage to be. Yes, He will use our marriages to challenge us and bring growth, but I think a place of refuge is a higher priority in God’s plan. 

I know many of you are thinking, “It must be nice”

Yes, it is. But it wasn’t always so. I had several years of my marriage being a source of stress, and my sex-life a place of pain. Getting from there to here was like walking on glass, but I’m daily glad I did it. No matter what goes wrong in my life, my marriage is a place of safety. Being with my wife is always healing. And being with her is always a joy.

This is God’s will for you and your wife. Make it your goal, and fight for it. Share the goal with your wife, telling her you want your marriage to be a place of safety and support for her. Ask her what needs to change for that to become a reality for her, and share what you need to get from where you are to that place.

Image Credit: © Paul H Byerly created with stockdreams.ai
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