Knowing the right time to have The Talk with your kids — about sex, maturing bodies, drugs, or any number of other heavy topics — can be tough. Because let’s face it: we may have brought them into this world but telling them how that happened without blushing can be a challenge for everyone involved. But Dr. Meghan Martin, a pediatric emergency room physician and mom of four based in Florida who posts on social media as @Beachgem10, has offered some excellent advice on the best place to have awkward conversations with your child.
“The birds and the bees, protection, drugs, all of that stuff: have those conversations in the car,” she suggests.
The good doctor highlights this tip as one of the best pieces of parenting advice she’s ever received (specifically from her best friend, who posts as @teawiththeteach).
“It’s brilliant!” she continues. “You have your hands on the wheel, you are looking straight ahead, you do not have to be making eye contact with anyone talking about the birds and the bees and the parts and the drugs or whatever that conversation is about that day. You also have a captive audience that is literally seat belted in behind you.”
But the fact that no one needs to look anyone in the face while hearing this embarrassing — but vitally important — information goes a long way in making the conversations less awkward and therefore making your kids more receptive to listening and asking questions of their own.
Even better, unlike sitting a child down at the kitchen table to have a Very Serious Conversation, the car is a bit more casual and therefore comfortable. You’re probably in the car everyday (if you’re anything like me and my kids, more than once).
Martin says she’s found success in talking to her older two children this way and that the car has become a “safe place” for them to ask questions. “I’m starting to have these conversations with my younger kids,” she adds, “and I want to emphasize how important it is to talk about these issues early so that when you get to that older teen/pre-teen time that it’s not the first time they’re hearing about it.”
Folks in the comment were quick to praise this idea and many shared how they’ve successfully broached difficult topics with kids of all ages.
“I like starting the conversations really young because they don’t understand what awkward is yet,” wrote @jessicacarlson44 on TikTok. “No filter is the best.”
“I did this,” agreed @bossrn6. “Add an ice cream cone to connect something enjoyable for the brain to connect to. My boys would ask for ice cream drives when they had something serious they wanted to discuss.”
Even followers who were “subjected” to car talks as kids chimed in.
“My mom ALWAYS did this,” @aawinter wrote with a laughter emoji. “I still get anxiety in the car with her wondering what she is going to bring up and I have my own family now. … I am glad she did and that she cared enough to have those conversations.”
The world is a complicated, sometimes scary place. Often, we as parents want to keep all that from our children as much as possible to protect them. But the truth of the matter is that, at some point, they’re going to learn, and it’s our job to make sure they have the best, most complete information possible to be able to navigate it on their own. It’s not easy, but maybe this advice can help make it just a teeny bit easier.
At the very least we can be comforted in knowing any given conversation can only last as long as the car trip!
